Is
your relationship with Christ dependent on your current circumstances? Do you
only go to Him when you’ve reached your breaking point and exhausted all your
other options or are you a fair weather friend who praises Him when things are
good but as soon as a shift occurs and the tide turns to rough seas you turn
your back on Him?
Our
relationship with God should be that of a Father and child. He’s the same
yesterday, today and forever. Our relationship should be too. When we learn how
to praise Him through the dark times and thank Him for the lessons, we will
start to feel the closeness of our Father. He wants to experience the bad and
the good, the sad times and the joyful times; with Him by our side.
It
is through the tests and trials that our character is formed. How we handle our
reactions to the bad things in life is a good indicator for where our heart is.
The more we put our trust in Him through all circumstances, the closer our
relationship will be. He always wants the best for us and delights in His
little children coming to Him in thanksgiving and praise but also for respite and
rest under the shelter of His great wing.
In
my daily devotional this morning from Jesus Calling, this line stood out to me:
“It is impossible to spend too much time thanking and praising Me.
This
is so true. How many times day do you thank Him? It should be more than you can
count, especially through the hardest days in the middle of the storm. That
is how we keep Him close and rely on Him for strength.
Dear
brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an
opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your
endurance has a chance to grow. So, let it grow, for when your endurance is
fully developed, you will be perfect and complete., needing nothing. James 1:2-4
I cried all morning, but wasn’t sure why. I took them to God in my quiet time of rest, seeking answers, finding peace again but still uncertain why I was crying. My heart just felt extra tender today.
Then as I finished I saw an alert on my phone telling me that my credit card had just been used in London to purchase train tickets. I was immediately able to block my card just before two other attempts, so there was only one charge that got through.
I was instructed to call my bank immediately, so I did. I hung up with a new sense of gratefulness for the quick response of my bank and being told I would not be responsible for the charge. In tears again, but I knew why this time, for God’s protection. So I thought it only fitting to post this poem God put on my heart a few weeks ago about how God can even redeem our tears. I hope you enjoy it. If you can relate, leave a comment, I would like to hear your experience of God’s beautiful redemption in your life.
A past filled with broken dreams
Hidden behind a mask of lies
A girl so naïve she thought she was loved
Her only tears filled with fear
By the grace of God she escaped his grasp
With a jaded view and a shattered heart
Her tears redeemed by scars and love
You may see her cry but she’s not sad
If she could save her tears and bottle them up
Dose by dose she would prescribe them to the world
Some of you may be wondering how the image above was birthed and became a greeting card in my collection. Here is the story behind the creation. I hope you see God’s hand in everything I do as well as His sense of humor and desire to make us laugh and enjoy life.
On several occasions in my neighborhood I have seen a bird I thought was a falcon. One morning I saw a bird on the ground in front of me sitting beside a rabbit as I ran down the street. On another occasion, while on a walk, a bird swooped through in front of me at every turn around the block. Another time I was running in the dark and saw a shadow of something sitting in the street in front of me. As I got closer it flew up and around me as if to get my attention. It has surely accomplished that goal. Its wings are pointed, and its body was dark but that is about all I could tell you from the couple of passes it made in front of me.
In
searching for falcon facts, I found they are small birds of prey and are
related to hawks and eagles. They have pointed wings and long tails. With keen
eyesight and soaring high above the ground, this gives them a great perspective
and higher vision.
Sitting
in quiet time has also been a time of reflection on the falcon. One morning,
the image came to me and it reminded me of the birds I had seen in my
neighborhood. I began to wonder if I really saw a falcon. I questioned if
falcons were indigenous to this area. Maybe I saw a hawk instead.
Then
I received this message very clearly in grand fashion: “I could bring a polar bear to stand up right and march a parade in
front of your house if I so desired. Nothing is beyond My reach if I wanted to
send you a message.”
I love that! It made me laugh to think about a polar bear leading a parade down my street. God has a sense of humor for sure. He delights in making us laugh and bringing us messages and gifts in all forms.
I received my
message from no human source, and no one taught me. Instead, I received it by
direct revelation from Jesus Christ. Galatians 1:12
So, Jesus told
them, “My message is not my own’ it comes from God who sent me.” John 7:16
Jesus
looked at them intently and said, “Humanly speaking, it is impossible. But with
God everything is possible.” Matthew 19:26
I
thought today was an appropriate time to pull out a message about spiders…I
hope you enjoy it.
Another
misunderstood creature, the spider. There are very few of us who like spiders
and don’t try to kill them or destroy their beautiful masterpiece almost
immediately upon creation. Either by accidently running into one or purposely
knocking it down. I am guilty of it as well. But I do love to watch them in
action and see the design and details they put into their work. Unless the
fresh, fallen dew has highlighted the work that went into a new web, on an
early crisp fall morning, we don’t usually see them until it is too late. There
is nothing like a face full of web to start your day.
But
seriously, a spider has everything inside it to survive every day and provide
for all its needs. The silk used to make the web has many uses. God designed
it, kind of like a swiss army knife, not only for survival but everyday life.
Did
you know a spider’s web reflects ultraviolet light? Some scientists believe
they use this mechanism to lure other prey into the web because insects like to
fly towards light. But they also use the silk to catch their prey. Since most
web-weaving spiders have poor eyesight, they are equipped instead with a sense
for movements and can detect vibrations on the web. (Hence the term, Spidey
senses.) This allows them to sense movements as small as the width of a human
hair.
The
intricate details of its design not only look like a form of art but also serve
a purpose that the spider uses naturally. But it comes at a cost. Silk
production is made from protein molecules that take a lot of energy from the
spider. (I will think about that before destroying one so quickly next time.)
There
are many speculations from arachnologists who wonder why a spider uses so much
of its energy to make such a design. Some theories include stability,
visibility, camouflage, prey attraction, mate attraction and even to expend
excess silk. Even if the experts can’t
figure out this mystery, God designed spider silk to be one of the best
building materials that is both strong and elastic. It can withstand a lot of strain before
breaking, it conducts heat and has antibiotic properties.
Spider
silk is also made from protein, produced by a gland in the spider’s abdomen.
The gland can store silk protein in liquid form. When it needs silk, the
liquefied protein passes through a canal where it gets an acid bath. As the PH
of the silk protein is lowered it changes structure. The pulling motion from
the spinnerets puts tension on the substance to help it harden in a solid as it
emerges.
The
firmer protein crystals give silk its strength while the softer protein
provides elasticity. Spiders are great recyclers by eating their webs in many
instances. They also use their sulk to travel, to keep from falling, to find
its way back home, as a shelter, to mate, and protect their offspring.
God
also puts His Spirit inside us and gives us gifts we can use in our everyday
life that reflect His light. We have everything we need inside us for our
everyday living. But most of us only use it or call on it when we are in
survival mode. God designed us to call on Him for our every day, walking around
life, to allow the Spirit to think, live and love through us, like we were
designed.
How
are we using the gifts and talents He placed inside us? Are we building
masterpieces and creating beautiful ways to reflect His light? Are we calling
on Him in our everyday life or winging it and missing the beauty of His design?
We
can weave some fantastic webs in our lives, but do they serve us well or trap
us? If we believe the lies of the enemy, we can get ourselves caught up in a
sticky web of deceit and start to believe what he says about us. But God speaks
truth- only God can define us and He helps us escape the enemy that wants to
hold us back.
As I was preparing to write this message, I saw a spider in my bathroom, and I heard this message: “You have everything inside you to carry out your purpose in this life. I have equipped you for this moment.” It also coincided with the day I signed the agreement to publish my books: Beyond Yourself, A Spiritual Awakening and Quiet Moments, Mornings with the Holy Spirit.
Enjoy life, accept your lot in
life, this is indeed a gift from God.
Eccl. 5:18-20
Pull me from the trap my enemies set for me, for I find protection in you alone. Psalm 31:4
Now
that it is getting colder again, I had to remind myself how many layers I
really need as I head out the door for an early morning run.
The
first cold snap and I put on way too many. I overdressed due to the initial
shock of the temperatures as I had been accustomed to the warmer mornings. But
from experience I knew I would warm up quickly when I got moving and be too
hot. I allowed my feelings in the moment decide for me and influence my
decision instead of going off experience and knowledge of the truth.
That
is so easy to do in other situations of our lives as well. We take how we are
feeling the moment and make a rash decision rather than looking into our past
experiences to pull out a well-thought out decision.
We
sometimes block out all awareness of Christ and go through life to the beat of
our own song. That is when we miss a lot of blessings. Bitterness destroys
lives, marriages and relationships.
Regret
and resentment from bad choices can weigh on us and we start to allow it to
define us and our self-worth takes a nose dive off the deep end. We sink like a
rock. That’s where Jesus comes in and throws us a life-line.
I
am learning to hit pause on my decision making until I have consulted God. I
have found Him to be a helpful and necessary consultant. This practice has
saved me from many bad decisions or ones that are made from feelings, in the
moment, rather than being based on His truth and knowledge from lessons
learned. If we look to Him before charging out on our own it can save us from
some major catastrophes in our life.
Leaning
to hit pause before I speak is also something I have had to learn over time. It
has kept me from blurting out something I would regret later. A simple, silent
prayer or whisper, “Help me Holy Spirit” helps me hold my tongue in certain
situations and respond appropriately.
There
are still times that I mess up, make mistakes and don’t know how to be honest
and direct in my communications. Usually because I don’t want to hurt someone’s
feelings. God is still working on me. He gives me insight on how to respond the
next time and courage to be honest and properly communicate what I mean.
Honesty
is always the best policy. That doesn’t mean I have to be mean or rude. It
simply means I can say what I mean in a kind, gentle way. I need to be direct
in my communications, so others are clear about my stance. Not being clear has
gotten me in trouble in the past. Not being able to say no is something I dealt
with that I don’t want to continue. Being firm is sometimes necessary in
certain situations. Boundaries are healthy and necessary.
Decisions
themselves have always been a struggle in my life. It was always easier to just
allow others to make them for me and not stand up for myself. (This is how I
became a co-dependent, people-pleaser) I grew up in a family that didn’t
communicate what they were really thinking. Trying to decide where to eat became a major
decision every time and resulted in us not being able to make any of the
important decisions in our lives. That carried over into adulthood for most of
my life. But God, is showing me how to make healthy choices and decisions that
have changed my life and ultimately lead me to Christ.
He
saved me from my bad choices and tells me that is not who I am. When our
self-worth is found in Christ alone we can get our head out of the water and
see the light again.
The
only one I need to please is God. That makes all my decisions clearer by asking
what God wants for me, based on His truth and the knowledge He gives me.
“Trust the Lord with all your heart, do not
depend on your own understanding. Seek His will in all you do, and He will show
you which path to take. Don’t be impressed with your own wisdom.” Proverbs
3:5-7
An honest answer
is like a kiss of friendship. Proverbs 24:26
On
one of my morning runs, I saw a black and white cat run across in front of me, not
just once but twice. Most of its body was black but it’s head and neck were
white. It made me think about how we look at things as black and white or gray
when we are somewhere in the middle.
I
used to be all on the black side before I surrendered to Christ. When I began my
journey, it didn’t happen overnight the day I was baptized. The bible says come
as you are not wait until you are completely clean.
I
then started thinking about pivotal moments in history when there were bad or
good things that happened in the world. We all know exactly where we were when
we heard the news about 9-11 for instance. I have also had pivotal moments
throughout my journey to Christ that I can remember exactly where I was and
about what date it happened. If I don’t remember the date I can look back in my
journals and usually find it.
These
are considered “Kairos” moments; (a propitious moment for decision or action.)
Once you decide to be a Christ follower you eventually go ‘all in’- you can’t
be both black and white or darkness and light. Most of us probably stay
somewhere in the middle most of our lives. I started thinking about when I went
all in and how long it took from the time, I had my accident and was baptized.
I pinpointed several pivotal moments that I can look back on and know that God
was shaping my character during those times to get me another step closer to a
Christ centered life. I couldn’t see it at the time but can now look back and
recognize how the important decisions I was making were better for my new life
and direction.
I
had just come out of an abusive relationship where I felt ashamed, unworthy of real
love and blamed myself for the things that happened to me. It was during this
timeframe of the breakup that I had my accident. The accident changed my life,
but it wasn’t at that exact moment that I went all in with Christ. That was
just the beginning.
I
was still dating and made bad choices for myself. But God began to work on my
heart and for the first time I realized that I didn’t have to allow a man to
disrespect my body just because that is what he wants. I have a choice. I have
a voice. I learned how to use it and stand up for myself. This Kairos moment
was just after my accident. This was only one stop on my road map to Christ,
but it was a very important one. I could have allowed this person to have his
way that day, like I had done so many times before with other men. But this
time was different. This time, a voice inside me told me I didn’t have to allow
this.
Another
important moment came the following year when I was dating again, this time to
a very nice person, but I knew I had to end it because I still wasn’t entirely
living for Christ. After a getaway weekend, I felt so convicted that I had to
end the relationship as soon as we got back. I couldn’t hide it or hold off any
longer. He could see it all over my face. I couldn’t hide it because God was in
my decision. I broke it off and moved another step closer to Christ.
Recently,
I was reminded of my accident and the events that happened that day. I saw each
step of that day moment by moment. I saw the changes I began making in my life
afterwards, but my lifestyle and focus on my relationship with God took time.
352 days came to mind. There were still a couple of bumps in the road, but He
led me to where I am today.
I
calculated the days to see what date that would be and then I searched all my
journals until I found it. Here is what I wrote in my journal 352 days from my
accident:
“A
person should never put themselves in a position that they would do anything
for another person when it conflicts with their morals and/or jeopardizes their
character. This type of relationship should only be with God. A person should
not put another person in that position or make it a condition of their
relationship or love for that person on those conditions.”
It
was very shortly after this that I stopped dating altogether and put all my
focus on my new relationship with God. I knew that is where my focus needed to
be, without distractions. This was my choice and five years later I am still
very happy about it. It gave me time that I needed to grow in Christ and figure
out who I was as a person and child of God.
I
am now reliant only on God. He is the only one I need to please. The things in
my life that I clung to the tightest are the very things I had to let go of.
The things I hid from for so long are the things that are being revealed and
bring me most joy because it will help others. He created me and saved me for
this purpose. I am chosen by God to carry out the mission He has planned for
me.
He
has a blueprint for my life that is unique as I am. He connects the dots on my
journey and directs my path on the road map to a Christ centered life that
brings joy and peace even through the speedbumps that occur along the way.
These just make me stronger and through endurance my faith grows.
Can
you look back and see any Kairos moments in your life that shaped your
character and brought you another step closer to Christ? Write them down. Pay attention
daily for any new opportunities. God can use everything for His good.
Dear brothers and sisters, when
troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.
For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to
grow. James 1:2-3
Don’t put limits on
yourself or what God can do through you. Are your goals for yourself set too
low? Release your dreams to God who knows His plans for you and see what He can
do.
God created the sky and
beyond. Keep your focus on eternity and the kingdom. It is time to soar above
your perceived limitations. He put the stars within reach- all you have to do
is look up. You are taller when you are on your knees.
You will discover
potential where you least expect it. Get in the game. Be an MVP, throw out the
first pitch without fear of failure. Expect the best (of yourself) because that
is what God wants for you and He will help you get there. Be confident, not in
who you are and what you can do, but who God is and what He can do through you.
His promises stand strong
as He blesses your life abundantly, reverently and masterfully as only He can
orchestrate. Spending time with the Spirit enriches your knowledge, refreshes
your soul and brings clarity to your mind.
Don’t underestimate the power of the Holy Spirit which lives within you. Your body is a temple. The Father sees all, knows all and can reach all. You are a beautiful flower in the garden of the Master Gardender.
“For I know the plans I have for you”, says
the Lord. “They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future
and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11
Part of this journey was to visit Hope Church in Chico and meet the people who received the encouraging notes sent last year after they lost their homes and church building in the fire. Yesterday, I drove to Chico, CA to attend services.
The message was about how God can use your pain and past experiences to help others. That was appropriate. I enjoyed worshiping with them and got the chance to meet the pastor afterwards.
On my way out of town I made a stop by the Butte County Fire Dept. to thank them for their service and let them know someone across the country in Lexington, KY is still praying for them.
The photo above is at McCloud Falls. Tim has been a great tour guide and given me many new memories of the area including a picnic and our hike to the falls.
Today is a quiet day, preparing for the trip home. I am grateful for all the experiences, love, new friendships and hospitality that has been extended to me on this journey- but I feel the mission is complete and am looking forward to getting back home.
God was definitely at work making divine connections and new memories.
We adore You as the one who is over all things. I Chronicles 29:11
I made it. It was a gorgeous day with a deep blue sky. My friends Timoth & Shahan drove me to the mountain yesterday. From the backseat, just as I requested, I peered out the window anticipating the moment I would recognize the location. The roads didn’t seem all that familiar to the memory I had until we got to the section of curve just before the accident sight.
I caught my breath as we slowed to a crawl and passed on by to conquer the drive to the top where the above picture was taken. Then we hiked a beautiful trail called Panther Meadow with lovely wild flowers of all colors scattered about in every direction.
A new day with new memories to cherish.
Light is sweet. How pleasant to see a new day dawning. Ecclesiastes 11:7
He makes me surefooted as a deer, enabling me to stand on mountain heights. Psalm 18:33
Today’s photo comes from my favorite spot on yesterday’s drive through Brookings, OR on the Samuel H. Boardman State Scenic Corridor. Arch Rock picnic area offered character, beautiful scenery, a place to eat my lunch and enjoy a nice walk along the perimeter.
Of course I shot several photos along the fence line before seeing the warning signs to not touch and steer clear of poison oak! I am pretty sure I did not touch it but sent up a little prayer anyway, because God only knows how allergic I am to that stuff and my past history with it and it’s cousin sumac.
Anyway, it was lovely drive and day. One of the most surprising things to me was seeing blackberry vines and apple trees on the trail down to the beach.
My talk went really well last night. I had a decent turnout and was pleasantly surprised once again how much love I could feel in the room for my sister, Amorah, and how it was extended to me as well. God continues to bless and amaze me in beautiful ways on this mission of hope. Thank you for all your prayers.
Faith Walk Ministries, Inc. 